2009, what a year you have been, and you’re not even finished yet.
I have mixed feelings when it comes to reflecting back on the year. I approach self examination apprehensively. It is no easy task for me.
Why? Mostly because I screw up so often. I get it wrong on such a regular basis, that it is easy to miss where I get it right. Depressing.
Also I’m human, and tend to judge those who fail harshly. Know what I mean? When someone burns me, it is harder for me to trust them the next time around. I just don’t believe them, or feel that past failure points to future failure.
I judge myself the same, and the pattern of my life seems to indicate there is some truth in that judgment. I do tend to keep on missing the mark.
I’m trying to stop this. You see our Father(the one in Heaven) does not do the same.
Even though I have failed God on so many occasions, that I can’t even recall all of them, He does not hold it against me. He still trusts me to do what He has asked me to do. He still believes in me. (I believe, Lord help my unbelief.)
He has not removed me from “ministry” till I can get my act together. No. He just keeps on making it possible for me to be here in Kenya.
I hope that as we reflect back on the year, that you will be able to forgive me, and trust me. I will try and do the same for you. Don’t worry, I’ll leave out most of my failures, and leave you reflecting on the successes. Plus I tend to believe that our successful care of orphaned/abandoned children balances out all my failures anyway.